The King’s
New Clothes
adapted by Joe Thompson
King: Woe is me. Woe is me. Franklin: Sire, is something wrong? King: Nothing. Oh no. Everything is fine. (Franklin returns to his duties. The king, Now louder than before) Woe is me. WOE IS ME. Franklin: I’m sorry sir. But I have the definite feeling something is wrong today. King: Oh no. Nothing. I’m the king. What could be wrong? Everything is just fine and dandy-Couldn’t be better. Wonderful. Terrific. (sings) S’wonderful.S’marvelous. (Franklin tries to return to his job. The king even louder now:) WOE IS ME. OH WOE IS ME. Franklin: Sire. I know nothing is bothering you. King: That’s right. Nothing. Franklin: But what exactly is it that is not bothering you? King: Rags. Franklin: Rags sire? King: Rags. My clothes are little more than rags. I might as well be a begger. I’m the king and I must wear rags. Franklin: Sire your clothes are made by the finest tailors in the land. They’re beautiful. Gorgeous. King: But I want them to be more than beautiful. More than gorgeous. I want them to splendiferous. Magical. Something you don’t see every day. Franklin: Then sire we shall put out a proclamation for the finest tailors in the world to come to our court and show you their best work. Narrator: And this is exactly what they did. The proclamation went out all over the known world, and hundreds of tailors came to show off their best clothes. But the king didn’t like any of them. King: Oh I liked most of them. But none of them were splendiferous. I wanted something different. Something you don’t see every day. Narrator: And it seemed that the king wasn’t going to find his splendiferous clothes after all. King: Is that all of the tailors? Franklin: I think so Sire. Puce: Wait a minute. Not so fast. (To Franklin) You look like a king with very special taste in clothes. King: I’m the king. Scarlet: She was talking to you. Franklin: But she was looking at me. Scarlet: It’s a bad habit she has. Franklin: Who, pray tell are you? Puce: Scarlet and Puce. Clothing design with magic sewn right into the fabric. King: Magic? What kind of magic? Scarlet: The best kind of magic. Your highness, look at this magic cloth. King: I hate it. Franklin: He hates it. Puce: Of course you hate it. It’s terrible. Did I say magic. That was not magic. This is the magic cloth. King: I hate it. Franklin: He hates it. Scarlet: I hate it too. That’s not magic. The next piece, that is the magic. Show him Puce: (searching in bag franticly, can’t find anything.) It’s here I know it is (to scarlet) I can’t find anything else. I left it back at the Inn. Franklin: The king is waiting. Do you have anything else to show us? If not, the door is this way. Scarlet: Of course we do. We’ve saved the best for last. Shield your eyes, because this is the one Dada. (pantomimes holding some cloth) Puce: Scarlet, you don’t have anything in your hand. Scarlet: That’s right Puce. I don’t have anything in my hand but the finest most splendiferous cloth that was ever made. Made by a magician in Mytie land. There is a myth about this fabric. I don’t actually believe it, but they say that idiots and fools can’t see it at all. Imagine. (laughs) King: (Laughing) Idiots and Fools can’t see it? Puce: Well I guess I’m not and idiot or a fool. I can see it. It’s splendiferous. Isn’t it splendiferous King? King: And you say Idiots and fools can’t see anything at all? Scarlet: That’s the legend. Look at the gold threads woven in. And the special threads made from actual diamonds and rubys. But I don’t think you can afford this. I better put it away before we go blind from the brilliance. King: No wait. Franklin: Oh your highness. King: Don’t tell me you can’t see it Franklin. I would hate to think I had an idiot or a fool for my advisor. Franklin: Well, sire I didn’t say I couldn’t see it. King: Can you see it? Franklin: Well, I don’t have my glasses on. Let me put them on. Oh yes that’s very different. I see much better now. Puce: Well, what do you think? You don’t see something like this everyday, do you? Franklin: No. You don’t. Narrator: And so the king paid the women a lot of money. I mean a lot of money. And instructed them to make him a set of clothes from the magic cloth. And at last the day arrived when the clothes were delivered. Woman: Excuse me mam. Are those the kings clothes in that bag? Do you think I could see them? Scarlet: I hope so. For your sake. Woman: What do you mean by that? Narrator: And Scarlet explained to the woman about the legend of the magic cloth and how idiots and fools couldn’t even see it. And finally she pulled it from the bag. Woman: Oh that’s lovely. That’s really – something you don’t see every day. Narrator: And the woman went and told all her friends about the magic cloth. And they told all their friends and soon all the people of the village knew the legend of the magic cloth.. And they all waited to see the king wear his new clothes. Franklin: Oh. I’m so nervous. Scarlet: Trust me. Everybody will love his new outfit. Puce: Its not something you see everyday. Scarlet: Would you please stop saying that. Puce: Well, it’s not something I say everyday. Franklin: Oh the crowds are gathering. Your Majesty. It’s time. King: (From offstage) Uh Yes well I – I – I’m coming. Franklin: Let’s hear it for the king. (General cheering) King! That’s your Cue. King: Yes Yes. I’m coming. I think. Puce: I think I hear my mother calling me. Scarlet: Your mother lives hundreds of miles away. Puce: My point exactly. Good bye all. It was great fun. Stay in touch. Franklin: Your Majesty. King: (entering in his long red underwear) I’m coming. (the crowd gasps. To one of the peasants: Why did you gasp. You can see the clothes can’t you? Peasant: Oh yes your majesty. I’m no fool. (crowd joins in I’m no fool- Beautiful Clothes etc. . .The king starts to feel better. He begins to parade around. The crowd kneels. One little kid comes running in) Kid: I’m sorry I was late. (She stops and stares at the king. Everyone watches her. She looks and looks) King: Is something wrong? Kid: Well, I hate to mention it. But you don’t have any clothes on. Franklin: Pay no attention to the child, Your highness. She must be a fool. Woman: No your highness. My daughter is nobody’s fool. If she says you don’t have any clothes. You don’t have any clothes. Frankly I don’t see any either. Crowd: I don’t either. Me either etc. . . Franklin: Your majesty they must all be fools!!! King: Silence. They are not fools. A child can not be a fool. She says the obvious. There is only one fool here today. Franklin: How brave you are to admit your foolishness sir. The sign of true leader. King: Not me. YOU! Franklin: Me? King: OK Maybe there are two fools here. May I borrow your coat madam. Narrator: And so the king went back to the castle, a humbler and wiser man. It took a child to point out what should have been obvious to everyone. King: Can I ask one little question? Narrator: Yes. King: A man just sold me this new blue hat with feathers. How does it look?? Narrator: Your Majesty. There is no hat. King: Ha! I knew that. I was just kidding. Franklin! Franklin!! Narrator: And everyone lived happily ever after. |
The poems, stories, skits and plays on this site are not public domain.
You may use them for fun or educational purposes, if you email me.
I charge no fees and have no advertisements,
so the best way to support the
site is to buy a CD